Tips for Starting Over and Rebooting Your Life

Power Quadrant System

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Power Quadrant System Summary

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Changing the Prescription of Your Life Lenses

After you complete the exercises in the preceding sections, you should know which life-lenses cause you problems. In this section, we give you three techniques for regrinding your life-lenses. It would be nice if you could toss the old lenses in the trash or throw them on the ground and stomp on them. But these lenses consist of almost shatterproof material after all, they're cast from the emotional turmoil of childhood (see The origins of life-lenses). Thus, you need to proceed slowly and cautiously. You may find the task of changing your life-lenses more challenging than you expected. Even if you put a lot of time and work into it, when you're tired or stressed, you may find yourself looking through your outdated prescription. That's okay. Your new prescription takes a while to break in. You're bound to use the old one out of habit. Your goal is simply to use the new lenses more often than the old ones (until you can't even find the old ones). If you find the task too difficult,...

How This Book Is Organized

Chapter 7 shows you how certain core beliefs darken and distort your view of yourself, your world, and your future as surely as eyeglasses with the wrong prescription muddle normal sight. We include tools for regrinding your life-lenses so you see things more clearly. Finally, in Chapter 8, you have the opportunity to practice mindfulness and acceptance more techniques for handling troubling thoughts. Chapter 9 spells out how you take direct action against the natural tendency to avoid what makes you depressed or anxious. In Chapter 10, we get you up and moving by providing workbook-type exercises that encourage physical exercise. When you're depressed or anxious, few activities sound like fun, so Chapter 11 has worksheets for reintroducing pleasure into your life. Finally, Chapter 12 helps you tackle life problems that grow out of your emotional distress.

In Vitro Transcription

Messages are transcribed in the presence of RNasin (Promega), all four deoxyribonucleoside triposphates (dNTPs), and the radiolabel a-32P -UTP (800 Ci mmol, New Life Science Products). Cotranscriptional capping is performed by using the cap analog m7(5')Gppp(5')G (New England BioLabs) at a concentration that is 10-fold in excess of the concentration of GTP.

Resuscitation of the patient with major trauma

Resuscitation of the trauma patient entails a primary survey followed by a secondary survey. The primary survey aims to identify and treat life-threatening conditions immediately and follows the well established sequence of A (airway and cervical spine stabilisation), B (breathing), C (circulation), D disability (neurological assessment) , and E (exposure). The secondary survey is based on an anatomical examination of the head, chest, abdomen, genito-urinary system, limbs, and back and aims to provide a thorough check of the entire body. Any sudden deterioration or adverse change in the patient's condition during this approach necessitates repeating the primary survey to identify new life-threatening conditions.

Dissociative Identity Disorder DID

Particular types of dissociative disorder are amnesia and fugue. In dissociative amnesia a person suddenly loses all recall of events that occurred during and after a particularly traumatic event. Although being able to live fairly normally in the world, the person might also have forgotten his or her name and address and the relevant details of other family members. After anything from a few hours to a few years, the person suddenly snaps back into full memory. With dissociative fugue, the person responds to a traumatic event by suddenly beginning an entirely new life, new identity, new job, new relationships, everything, with absolutely no memory of what went before.

Entertaining Enjoyment

Introducing pleasure back into your life Staying away from trouble Overcoming obstacles to pleasure t's hard to be anxious or depressed when you're having fun. Laughter, enjoyment, and pleasure interfere with feelings of sadness or worry, and pleasure actually causes your body to release endorphins, brain chemicals that increase a sense of well-being. Unfortunately, when you suffer from anxiety or depression, you tend to withdraw from pleasurable activities. Thus, we recommend that you bring pleasure back into your life as part of your healing process.

Its hard not to think about my bones being weak How do I keep osteoporosis from interfering with my life

Being told you have low bone mass or diagnosed with osteoporosis can represent an opportunity for change. Rather than letting the news interfere with your life, think of it as an opportunity to make positive changes. Rather than feeling deprived or feeling old, let osteoporosis be a life-changing moment. Because osteoporosis is a silent disease, you probably did not know you had it. But some of the changes you make now can positively affect the rest of your life. Above all, keep moving Develop an exercise routine that you can stick with. Find ways of staying active that you enjoy. Once you realize that osteoporosis doesn't have to interfere with your life, you can improve your bones while you improve your life a greater possibility of new depression during this time of your life. In fact, three times more women experience depression during perimenopause than at any other time prior to that. If you are a man at midlife, you may be having many of the same symptoms women experience...

Finding Meaning at Your Funeral

You probably think that your funeral would be a rather odd place to find meaning in your life, and you may wonder why a book purporting to provide help with emotional distress is asking you to think about dying. Well, give us a minute here, okay Let us explain. Finding meaning and purpose in life is about connecting with ideas and concepts that are larger and deeper than yourself. For many, religion and spirituality are the primary channels for finding such meaning. But regardless of your spiritual beliefs, giving serious consideration to what you want your life to be about, in other words, the legacy you want to leave behind, can be an enlightening exercise. In this section, we ask you to think about your funeral or memorial service and the thoughts and feelings that those in attendance may experience when contemplating your life. What do you want people to remember about your life The following exercise helps you discover the traits, characteristics, and values you hold most dearly....

The origins of lifelenses

Usually, the prescription for your life-lenses is established in your childhood. People don't come into the world seeing themselves as inadequate, undeserving, entitled, or perfectionis-tic. Rather, they learn these patterns through repeated experiences. Life-lenses emerge from abuse, abandonment, betrayal, criticism, natural disasters, loss, rejection, and other emotionally powerful events. On the road to understanding and changing your life-lenses, it helps to reflect on what caused you to acquire the lenses you look through in the first place. When you understand these origins, you can release the notion that you're crazy, weird, or messed up. Self-forgiveness releases energy that you can use for grinding new lenses for better vision.

Questions and possibilities

Have your patterns of exercise, diet, smoking and drinking, etc., changed over the course of your life If so, what has led to those changes What are the main causes of stress in your life What are the main causes of stress in the lives of your family and friends Have these stressors changed over time What are the main daily hassles in your life What can you do about them Do you think that anything that you do might be causing a daily hassle for anybody else

Putting Events Feelings and Sensations Together

As you work through this chapter, you should become more aware of how your body reacts to events in your life. And thanks to the Daily Unpleasant Emotions Checklist in the previous section, you have feeling words to label your mental and physical states. It's time to connect these body sensations and feeling words to the events that trigger them.

Lifting Mood Through Exercise

In this chapter, we tell you how much exercise you need to get those endorphins going, and we tell you about all the known benefits of exercise. You pick your top ten reasons for beginning or sticking with an exercise program and then figure out an exercise plan that fits your lifestyle. We also offer some tips for finding the motivation to keep exercise going in your life.

Discovering Whats Really Important

What do you value How much of your time to you devote to activities that are meaningful and consistent with your values And do you live your life according to those values If not, you're probably not as happy as you could be. The following Values Clarification Quiz can help you focus on what's really important to you. After you fill it out, you can use the results to redirect your life plan in a more meaningful way.

Doing the right things

The technique we explain in this section, the Satisfaction Tracker, is designed to track satisfying activities. Paying close attention to satisfying activities highlights what's going right in your life, and increasing your focus on your well-being improves your odds of preventing relapse. Using Cindy's Satisfaction Tracker as a guide, complete your own Tracker in Worksheet 17-8 in order to keep track of the good stuff going on in your life. Remember to include major as well as minor events.

Shining the light on your defensive behavior

Before you can stop making the malicious assumption and following it with defensive responses, you need to see how these behaviors play out in your life. Therefore, we suggest you track events in which these behaviors crop up. Use the following instructions as your guide. (After you identify your own defensive behaviors, we give you an alternative to defen-siveness and explain a method for dealing with truly hostile criticism in a way that may lead to better outcomes.)

What are some ways to prevent falls

Because falls account for 95 of bone fractures, it's important to find ways to prevent them. When people fall in their homes, others may wonder how that can happen in a familiar environment. But you can fall anywhere, including your own home where you may have walked the same floors for half of your life. You may have medical conditions that contribute to a loss of balance. You may be rushing to answer the phone or get to the bathroom. Or you may trip on that piece of carpet you've been meaning to tack down for a long time. (Table 17 lists ways of preventing falls.) There are things you can do now to help you take control and prevent falls. It's not just the new lamp with a long cord that can trip you. If you

Worksheet 48Jasmines Reflections

Now it's your turn to fill out a Mood Diary (see Worksheet 4-9). This exercise can provide you with invaluable information about patterns and issues that consistently cause you distress. This knowledge helps you see what needs to change in your life. The exercise also lays a foundation for changing your thinking, which we get into in Part II of this book.

What to Do When Willpower Wilts

Working through the preceding section gives you some pretty good reasons for exercising (ten, in fact ). And hopefully you've found a few types of exercise that just may fit into your life and have tried them out. Your intentions may be good, but what happens when your initial enthusiasm and commitment to do something positive for yourself fade Or, how do you get started if you haven't found that initial enthusiasm

Disrupting satisfaction interrupters

Notice how Austin's initial, satisfying thoughts were zapped by his satisfaction-interrupting thoughts. These satisfaction-interrupting thoughts didn't make Austin feel depressed (like the thoughts discussed in Chapters 5, 6, and 7), but they robbed him of his good feelings. When the joy in your life gets stolen in this manner, you're be more susceptible to relapse.

Arriving at Acceptance

Don't get us wrong we want you to feel good most of the time. But as far as we know, the only humans who don't feel some anxiety or sadness are, well . . . dead. Besides, if you don't know sadness, it's difficult to know what happiness is. Without worry, you wouldn't appreciate calm. Accept a certain degree of difficult emotions as part of your life.

Mileposts in Discovering Biological Phenotypes

In 1961, the first NIH grant on Alzheimer's disease was awarded to Robert Terry. The award represented the conceptual-scientific link between the earlier studies in Europe and a new beginning in the US. Robert Terry, a neuropathologist, along with his longtime collaborator Robert Katzman, a clinical neurologist, began to develop modern interdisciplinary research in neuroscience, which had begun earlier in the UK. By the 1970's under their leadership, the Albert Einstein College of Medicine became one of the most important centers for research. The overall impact of the Terry-Katzman team is enormous because of their multiple roles as investigators, teachers, and patient advocates. Their legendary contributions set the scientific compass for subsequent explorations in the field.

Have early menopause What does this mean for my bones and will I need treatment

When you are trying to cope with the treatments for cancer, it's hard to think about your bones and the possibility of developing osteoporosis so early in life. But the fact is that when you stop having your menstrual periods for whatever reason, your risk of bone loss increases. When you experience a natural menopause around the average age of 51, you can expect to lose bone most rapidly in the 4 to 8 years following menopause (starting one year after your last period). There are several reasons why you might experience menopause much earlier than that and, therefore, need to cope with a larger stretch of your life without estrogen, an important hormone for bone growth.

Worksheet 22My Emotional Origins

In the search for causes of your anxiety or depression, you need to include a review of your world. Open your eyes and observe. What's going on in your life that aggravates your distress From daily traffic hassles to major losses, stressful events deplete your coping resources and even harm your health. Complete The Current Culprits Survey in Worksheet 2-3 to uncover the sources of your stress. You can't make your world less stressful unless you first identify the stress-causing culprits.

Fact Add is a complex disorder that involves impairments in focus organization motivation emotional modulation memory

Impaired Executive Functioning

Imagine a large carton filled with photographs taken throughout your life. The carton is filled with snapshots of you and various family members roller skating or riding bikes, fishing off a pier or swimming in a lake, dressing up for Halloween or setting off for the first day of school. Some are posed with you in your Scout or Little League uniform or in costume for a dance recital. Others are candid shots taken around a birthday cake, in the midst of holiday celebrations, or at other memorable moments.

Exercise and Senescence

There is no clear evidence that exercise will prolong your life, but there is little doubt that it improves the quality of life in old age. It maintains endurance, strength, and joint mobility while it reduces the incidence and severity of hypertension, osteoporosis, obesity, and diabetes melli-tus. This is especially true if you begin a program of regular physical exercise early in life and make a lasting habit of it. If you stop exercising regularly after middle age, the body rapidly becomes deconditioned, although appreciable reconditioning can be achieved even when an exercise program is begun late in life. A person in his or her 90s can increase muscle strength two- or threefold in 6 months with as little as 40 minutes of isometric exercise a week. The improvement results from a combination of muscle hypertrophy and neural efficiency.

Disorder

A Yale University Press Health & Wellness book is an authoritative, accessible source of information on a health-related topic. It may provide guidance to help you lead a healthy life, examine your treatment options for a specific condition or disease, situate a healthcare issue in the context of your life as a whole, or address questions or concerns that linger after visits to your healthcare provider.

Authors preface

The godfather of Soviet rocketry, Sergei Korolev, once encouraged a reluctant colleague to work for him by explaining the awesome experience of watching a rocket launch. Once you've seen it, he said, it will stay with you for the rest of your life. He might just as well have been talking about watching a satellite in those early years. Sputnik and the host of American and Soviet satellites that followed in its wake all left a profound impression on me.

And Function

The adult human heart has a mass of approximately 300 g. If it beats 70 times per minute, then it will beat 100,000 times per day, 35 million times per year, and 3 billion times (3 X 109) during your lifetime. If each beat ejects 70 mL of blood, your heart pumps over 7000 L, or the equivalent of 1800 gal day. That is the same as 30 barrels of blood each and every day of your life The lifetime equivalent work done by the heart is the equivalent of lifting a 30-ton weight to the top of Mount Everest. All of this work is done by a very hardworking 300-g muscle that does not rest

Narrative Approaches

Most narrative therapeutic approaches share the goal of weaving painful, negative, or other unexpected events into the client's dominant life narrative. That is, the client and therapist collaborate to help the person both live and author an active, integrated story. Here, the therapist functions as an editor or co-author in attempting revisions of the client's life narrative. For instance, treatment for the bereaved spouse might focus on grieving the loss of the partner by examining how the person dealt with previous losses and the way these were integrated or interpreted in the larger framework of meaning that informs the person's life. Emphasis also may be placed upon developing further roles with children, other family, and friends as a way to emplot a new life chapter without the deceased spouse.

Career

Any of life's transitions is difficult, but the transition to retirement can be made easier if it is approached with clear personal goals. If retirement is seen as a new beginning at something different in life, then it seems easier to bear, indeed, might even be looked forward to. If a person ducks from thinking about it until the day when he or she suddenly finds himself or herself suddenly not going to work, then it can be very difficult and can also put a strain on marriages. A couple might well have found good ways of living together given 40 or so hours a week when they are apart. Now, unless they make some special provision, they could be together 100 per cent of the time. This takes some adjustment.

Becoming active

You'll never fully replace someone you've lost because people and relationships are all unique and, in one sense, irreplaceable. Nonetheless, you can pick up the pieces, move on, and refill your life with meaningful relationships and activities. We suggest you explore the following after you begin to recover Volunteer work A great way to regain a sense of meaning in your life is to help others. Plus, volunteer work often leads to friendships and a new social circle. Pleasurable activities Even if you feel sad and unenthusiastic, putting pleasure back into your life is possible (see Chapter 11 for more about healthy pleasures). You won't feel like you should indulge in pleasure, but after you start to recover from your loss, allowing yourself to enjoy things can accelerate your healing.

Motivation

Think about your life in terms of Maslow's hierarchy of motives (see Chapter 5). Are you stuck at a particular level How can you become unstuck In what areas of your life are you self-actualised Set up conditions so that you can aim at self-actualisation throughout all areas of life. Prioritise your goals. Consider the degree to which you are unwittingly driven by the need to achieve or the need to have power or the need to amass money. Think about the occasions when you experience flow-time and work out a programme to increase their frequency. Think about the occasions when you have had peak experiences and decide how you can have more.

Rateof Living Theory

This theory takes a pragmatic approach to the regulation of life span. Simply put, it claims that if you are going to live fast and hard, your life will be short. The engine in a race car, run at full throttle, is lucky to last a full day. On the other hand, engines that are driven carefully, at modest RPMs, can last for 10 to 20 years and may even log 200,000 miles. Of course, if you buy a new car, park it in a garage, and rarely drive it, it will last even longer. This theory is not concerned with the underlying mechanism of aging, but simply advocates repair or replacement of body parts as they wear out, much in the way we deal with a broken-down car.

Sizing things up S

Rather than bury your head in the sand, take a good, hard look at your problem. Gather information about it, and think about the causes and the relative importance of the problem to your life. Believe it or not, you're not the first person to experience your problem. You can obtain information by talking to others, through books and articles, or by searching the Internet. Finally, reflect on what feelings this problem stirs up in you.

Writing testimonials

One strategy for bringing gratitude into your life by writing testimonials was developed by Dr. Martin Seligman, and we think it's a great idea. Dr. Seligman conducted some research on this technique and found that participants felt great after completing it. 1. Choose someone from your life who has made a real positive difference in your life. 5. In Worksheet 18-6, reflect on this exercise and what it's taught you about the good people and things in your life.

Examining Life Lenses

With some understanding of life-lenses, it's time to take a look at which lenses may be affecting you and your life. After all, changing the way you feel starts with identifying your problematic life-lenses. If you aren't aware of your own life-lenses, you're powerless to do anything about them.

Hunger

Bear in mind that one of those unpleasant rules of life is that it is easier to put weight back on than it is to lose it. This means that if you want to lose enough weight to alter your body shape, then you will have to make a permanent change in your life-style. And this can be expensive. Eating less and running on the spot

Educating Educators

Some of the colleagues I respect most report that the most satisfying aspect of their careers has been the opportunity to help educate the next generation of physicians. It is one of the most profound and enduring sources of professional fulfillment. There is something intellectually and even spiritually rewarding about helping others to excel at the craft to which you have devoted your life. If we keep our medical students and residents so busy that they never have chances to experience teaching firsthand, we are doing not only them but also our profession a profound disservice.

End of a mission

Ostensibly, there was nothing hidden from the public about the airborne recovery of these satellites in fact, photographs were released showing the dramatic and skilful capture of one of these descending satellites by C-119s in a procedure that would become almost routine. It was only the true purpose of the entire operation that was

A meticulous sham

While this launch carrying the mice did take place, the biological aspect of later research missions in Project Discoverer was mostly a meticulous sham, created to disguise the true purpose of the programme, which was to launch a highly-classified series of spy satellites known as Argon, Lanyard and Corona - but principally Corona. Managed by the newly-created Advanced Research Projects Agency (ARPA) of the Department of Defense and the U.S. Air Force, Discoverer was a military-backed ruse designed to fool Cold War adversaries into believing it was nothing more than a relatively benign, biological research programme.

Pleasure Busters

Emotional distress and especially depression cause distorted thinking (see Chapters 5, 6, and 7 for the lowdown on distorted thinking). In this section, we zero in on the thoughts that are most likely to interfere with your efforts to increase pleasure in your life. Three types of distortions typically get in the way thoughts of undeservingness and unworthi-ness, thoughts that pleasure is a frivolous waste of time, and thoughts that deny the effectiveness of pleasurable activities. If you find that you're resisting increasing pleasure in your life, it's likely you have one or more pleasure-busting thoughts. The following exercise helps you identify the pleasure-busting thoughts you may have and develop more adaptive, pleasure-boosting thoughts. Did you notice that last item, Increased productivity Many people think that non-work related activities are frivolous. Truth is, putting pleasure into your life actually makes you more productive when you're working. You have more enthusiasm...

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